How To Write Personal Wedding Vows
I’ve been to many weddings, and every single time I go to a wedding, my absolute favorite part is the exchange of personal wedding vows! The tears always start flowing as I’m behind the camera capturing the raw and beautiful emotions that personal vows bring. If you have decided to write your own vows, you may feel overwhelmed and have no idea where to begin. Well, I’ve got you!
When I sat down to write my vows, I had so many things I wanted to say, but I was clueless about how to structure them and where to begin. I have 4 tips that will help you significantly when putting your thoughts to paper!
1. Read Personal Wedding Vows Examples
Before you even begin trying to write your vows, look at examples. You can Google “Personal Wedding Vow Examples,” and you’ll get so many results. The Knot has a blog full of examples- you can find that here! What I would do is jot down ideas that you come across that speak to you and spark your inspiration. Another idea is to ask your married friends who exchanged personal vows for help! Ask them what helped them organize and get their ideas written down.
2. Talk To Your Partner
This is one of the most important tips, and I thought about this after a particular ceremony I witnessed. The ceremony was so beautiful, the bride and groom’s vows were so touching. However, it was clear that they had not discussed anything about their vows to each other. One partner had written pages in their vow book; it was evident a lot of time and thought went into what they were saying. Their vows had a more serious and romantic tone. The other partner had written half a page, and the tone was very light hearted and playful.
The one partner who had written more was definitely standing there thinking, “that’s all you wrote?!” It wasn’t a big deal, but to bypass that awkward moment sit down and talk about your vows! Here are some things you should go over…
- Talk about the tone – If you two have different personalities it is totally fine if your vows are more silly and spirited, while your partners may be more romantic. I would just make sure that you go over some guid lines, if there’s something you don’t want your partner to say (like an embarrassing story) just communicate that!
- Talk about length – This might be the most important! Agree on either an estimated amount of words or how long you each want to read your vows for. I think my husband and I each read for about 2 minutes. However, if you want to keep it shorter you can!
3. Write Your Personal Wedding Vows In Advance
Do NOT wait until the last minute to write your personal wedding vows! It will feel overwhelming and will stress you out, and writing your vows shouldn’t have any negative feelings surrounding them! It’s supposed to leave you feeling even more excited to share them with your partner. I recommend writing them way in advance. Don’t wait until the morning of your wedding because I promise you’re going to feel rushed.
Let me share a little story… my husband and I eloped in Hawaii. The morning of our elopement we woke up bright and early and walked to go get our favorite breakfast on the island. Well we were a little too excited because we didn’t realize the cafe didn’t open for another hour and we didn’t have that kind of time to sit and wait for them to open.
We walked back to the hotel and he left to go get us some malasadas, well the line was incredibly long and we weren’t able to get them. He got back from attempting to get breakfast and didn’t have as much time as he thought he would have to get ready. Thankfully his vows were already written because there’s no way he would have had time to write them the morning of! Things happen and you don’t want to put yourself in a sticky situation!
My absolute favorite guide to writing your vows is, I Just Wanted To Say Vow Journal. I promise it will help you so much to get all your ideas out before you even begin writing your vows and it will give you so many good tips. You can buy yours, here!
*Disclaimer, I do earn a small commission when you purchase your vow journal through this link!
4. Practice Saying Them Out Loud
It is so important to practice saying your vows out loud! It will help to make sure that everything flows smoothly, you can practice the tone, the pauses, etc. You want to feel prepared for reading them so that you feel confident in what you’re saying!
Writing your own wedding vows can feel extremely overwhelming and intimidating but it doesn’t have to be! I had so much fun when I sat down to write my own. It made me fall even more in love with my husband and get more excited to share them with him. These tips will help you feel more prepared and confident when it comes to sitting down and writing your own personal wedding vows!
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